Seth’s World View

I’d like to think I’m a risk-taker, but it all depends on the nature of the risk.

I’d like to think I’m brave enough to be vulnerable, but how often am I willing to be messy?

But really, it’s me wondering how concerned I am about the response of the people around me, or to the girl I might share my heart with. Will I judge myself by that response? Will I condemn myself? Or will I do well and judge myself by that?

I came to the conclusion, more emotionally, that I don’t care about doing any right anymore, or being the good Christian, or what people think. Of course, I still do, but I care less. Care isn’t the right word. Perhaps I will be less concerned about response, knowing I can’t control someone else’s heart, only my own.

Can I control my own heart? It would be easier if I could. Easier easier if I listened to my intuition, trusted it, followed it. Honestly, I’ve been led astray just as much by intellect as by emotion. I’m not sure which is more trustworthy. Though right now, I’m wondering if my emotions speak more truth than my mind. And I wonder if I will lay it out, or not, the nothing which is the status quo.

One thing’s sure: the same is no longer desired. I’ll break out of my shell one way or another.